Why Date an Asian…Chick?

One of my favorite websites, Racialicious, did an excellent blog post about the depressing existence and overall awfulness of the website, “Classy Asian Ladies”.  A vile quote from the website:

“While Asian women are well known throughout the world for their exotic beauty and sensitive nature they are also very smart and well educated, and in many cases high earners in the job market.”

Seriously.  Who hasn’t vomited yet?

Hop over here for the full article.  I’m not going to comment on it any further because:

a)  The Racialicious article does a great job breaking down the implications of this website.

b)  These stereotypes and outdated racial views are 500% (bad math, I know) the reason why I write and perform.

The author was also kind enough to draw the following conclusion at the end:

“At times like this, I like to visit Big Bad Chinese Mama, or listen to Jen Kwok’s Date An Asian. But watch out, these are not for the faint of heart. These classy Asian ladies are writing some serious satire, and they have a lot of rage.

But can you really blame them?”

Sometimes I really do want to quit what I’m doing – for various reasons.  I’m often worried about being misinterpreted as offensive or perpetuating the very thing I’m trying to satirize.  I’ve definitely been accused of it.

But once in awhile, I feel like someone really gets what I’m trying to do, and I realize it isn’t all for naught.

A Two Month Conversation On YouTube

Date an Asian has inspired 697 comments thus far – some loving, some passionate, some utterly bat shizz cray-cray, and an unexpectedly large number about whether Ph(F)ilipinos are “Asian” or not. It was like one loooong conversation with the public as one schizophrenic-ass commenter.

A Two-Month Conversation On YouTube
by Jen Kwok and YouTube Commenter

YouTube Commenter:
This is gonna go viral haha

Jen Kwok: Yes, it just did! In fact, it was on MTV Iggy, Angry Asian Man and Buzzfeed – and it was the YouTube #1 Comedy Spotlight Video! I can hardly believe it.

YouTube Commenter: This is what I’ve been telling people all along. I’m a 28 y/o smooth skinny white guy now and most other gay guys that fit that description aren’t interested in asians. But I’ve been dating asian guys ever since I was 17…most have a lot to offer…in fact my faith in God is reinforced by how many wonderful, beautiful Asian men there are in the world…our culture should recognize this…

Jen Kwok: Thank you for getting it, SSWG!

YouTube Commenter: Comment removed by author

Jen Kwok: Did you say something?

YouTube Commenter:
Comment removed by author

Jen Kwok: Oh. Okay, I guess not…. I just thought I heard…

YouTube Commenter: WOW, WOW, Did she just say SRI LANKAN????? AWESOME

Jen Kwok:
Yes. Yes, I did ;) Hehe.

YouTube Commenter:
man..this song is gonna get some pussies for my asian cock!!

Jen Kwok:
Haha, yes. Well… IF you manage to treat the ladies attached to the pussies decently for at least a few hours first! HAHA *sigh* And to think my song might have something to do with it…. Young love – so buoyant and multi-partner-y and carefree until consequences happen!

YouTube Commenter: Holy crap I have the same Accord with the same paint color. Just mine is more faded.haha

Jen Kwok: Ha ha. WOW. Ha! Whoah. I can’t believe you used ZERO exclamation points in a comment that started off with the worlds “holy crap”. Haha! I would have thought that was punctuation-ally impossible, but you just proved me wrong. Wow! Whoah! Geez! That was the most mellow realization ever. Haha!! hoho! Heehee…

YouTube Commenter: I took your advice.. and I fucked the first asian guy I saw. Thanks.

Jen Kwok: ….haha! Heehee! Oh God. Sorry, I’m still laughing from the comment before yours. But, hey – you’re welcome. And thanks for taking this message to heart and reporting it in such a matter-of-fact way. That means it happened.

YouTube Commenter: your dad’s kinda hot.

Jen Kwok: Thanks. He’s actually Phil Nee, an awesome stand-up comedian and photographer. He’s not really my dad.

YouTube Commenter: lol was that over the line? sorry =P

Jen Kwok: No, no, no. Phil’s a very lovely man. But if you had said that about my real dad, I probably would have cut you, LOL ;)

YouTube Commenter: Hahahaha I love this video! I love you Jen Kwok! I AM Dating an Asian guy, his name is Tim! Ha

Jen Kwok: Awww, that’s great! God, I’m a sucker for a love story. Well, Tim sounds like a great guy, and I wish you two the very best :D

YouTube Commenter: I think all Asian men should be more aware of what is going on. Asian women have affirm the racial stereotypes of Asian men. Asian women, along with the white majority have effectively turned future generation of Asian kids into eunuch. It is funny, that white people and Asian women are laughing at us in public. When you have comedian like Ester Ku and ANTM Gina Cho making stereotypical statement about Asian men in the media, and the 50% out marriage rate to only whites, there is something

Jen Kwok: *nodding* OK….I see what you’re…

YouTube Commenter:
cont. deeply wrong with America. The fact that there is a video like this shows you how bad things have gotten for Asian men in this country. Women are laugh at us. I am a good looking guy and when I go on my travel, I still get the small dick stereotype out in public. Is this what my son going to have to grow up in? Asian women with whites reinforced stereotypes. So as far as I am concern, Asian women are pretty much the enabler of the emasculation of Asian men in American.

Jen Kwok: Man, I’m sorry you feel that way, but my intention was actually to subvert those stereotypes. I can’t help it if people don’t get what I’m trying to do, but…well….

YouTube Commenter: its just a fucking joke. stop getting so butt hurt. it is hilarious.

Jen Kwok: Aww, thanks for coming to my defense! But…are…people really getting “butt hurt” on my video? I mean, I’m not really even sure what that means. Like, are they sitting too long and unable to go to the bathroom or something, or…. Well, at any rate, I hope they’re not getting “butt hurt”. Unless that’s what they’re into. I’m not here to judge….

MTV Iggy Interview!

Hey guys,

So I did a lil interview with the folks at MTV Iggy about the “Date an Asian” video, addressing some of the issues of race, answering some questions from YouTube commenters and talking about comedy in general. Check it out here: MTV Iggy Interview

Mad props to Woody and Samantha at MTV Iggy for being so crazy supportive and “getting” the message.

Thank you to all the friends and fans for the overwhelming support of this video! This was a labor of love a year in the making, and I’m so glad that people are enjoying it.

<3 Jen

New Music Video – DATE AN ASIAN

My new music video, Date an Asian, is a hot (and hilarious) R&B joint about dating Asian men.

Here it is:

After fun ass day of shooting and a star studded live premiere at Sulu Series, this video is ready for all the world to see!!!

We hope that you enjoy it, and please please please help promote it!!!

1. Email this vid to all your peeps, groups and listservs:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pG9vYZmoqmg
2. Post the video link to facebook, Twitter, MySpace, tumblr, blogs, etc!
3. Embed the video wherever you can!
4. “Favorite”, share, leave comments, “thumb up” on YouTube!
5. Stream the video on a laptop strapped to your chest!

Asian men are finally gettin’ their due, so please spread the love!!!

http://www.dateanasian.net (designed by the lovely Donna Kwok).

Thank you to everyone who helped make this video happen!


A Horribly Productive/Destructive Weekend!

My dear Tommy went back home to Staten Island for the weekend, and I was left to my own devices.

Friday Night:
Stayed home to nurse the contrails of my never-ending flu from last weekend.  I ended up drinking about six servings of miso soup, while watching the following:  five hours of Bravo (split between Real Housewives of Atlanta and Las Vegas Taxi Cab Confessions), an episode of Amazing Wedding Cakes, an episode of Bridezillas, Gwyneth Paltrow’s View from the Top, and a horrible Lifetime movie about a Mormon love quadrilateral starring Jennie Garth called A Loss of Innocence.


Oh Jenny....

So basically, I drank two gallons of salt water and had estrogen pumped through the television, into my eyeballs.  It was horrible.  I might as well have cut myself or eaten a quart of Rocky Road Ice Cream while dressing up my Barbie doll collection.  I literally watched TV for 9 hours.  It started at 7pm and lasted until 4am.  WHAT KIND OF FREAK AM I?!?!

Went to brunch with Adina in the East Village, wandered around Urban Outfitters, and picked up my books on reserve from Greenpoint Library.  And you know what?  It turns out there’s another Jennifer Kwok who goes to my branch!  I know this because I certainly did not order a Japanese manga written in Japanese with no pictures in it (seriously, what is that? )!  Then I went home and started reading my actual somehow-in-my-mind-less-dorkier book choice, The Golden Compass.  Then, realizing that I probably shouldn’t have ANY more miso for the rest of my life because I had consumed about 12,000 grams of sodium the night before, I decided to order in a Papacitos fish burrito.



I ate this while watching Kubrick’s Lolita and marveling at the great acting – Peter Sellers rocks it in this movie (and James Mason and Shelly Winters are no schlubs either). After the movie, I fulfilled my weeklong craving for Haagen Daaz and bought a pint of Bailey’s flavored ice cream at my local pseudo-gourmet grocery market.  I went to bed EARLY – like 9pm, after Friday night’s fiasco.

Woke up relatively early after 12 hours’ sleep and started going through emails.  I grabbed a shower, ran some errands at Rite Aid (where they already have Halloween stuff up, BTW – horrifying!!!!) and bought a couple donuts and coffee from Peter Pan’s, which is now infamous for its Donut Ice Cream Sandwiches.  Got back home and edited/practiced my verse for “Trapped in a Dungeon”, a guest-rap-laden song by my buddy Soce, The Elemental Wizard.  Then I wrote and practiced my rap verse of a song we’re doing together, “Ride the Bus”, which will be released as a B-side to my single (also produced by and featuring Soce), “Date an Asian”.

After all that musical mayhem, I made some No Pudge Brownies and cleaned the house before my Tommy came home (it’s all the Mad Men watching that’s got me acting like robo-live-in-girlfriend).


No effing PUDGE - that's what I said!

Actually, the brownies were for my former boss, who is letting us stay at her house during our vacation, and Soce, who is hard at work producing all these awesome tracks!  I headed over to Manhattan (going from the G to the 7 because there is no service to Manhattan from 23-Ely Ave for the fourth weekend in a row) and met with my former boss to grab keys, directions, etc.  Then I headed downtown to record my rhymes with Soce.

Continuing with the self abuse, I came home not having eaten any dinner – BUT buying a goddamn Van Leeuwen ice cream while waiting for the bus on Bedford Ave.  WHY?!?!?!?!  Ugh, that ice cream is so good it’s hard for me to eat other ice cream now….  It didn’t melt once while I was waiting 15 minutes for that bus – not a square millimeter of it.  It’s perfect!!!!


Stupid Van Leeuwen, you hurt so good!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Finally, I got home and found my dear Tommy there, uploading a ton of pictures of his weekend at home, along with adorable 10 second videos of his dog running around and drinking water – videos that, BTW, would probably get more YouTube hits than all my videos combined!

It was nice to be kind of left alone this weekend, but between the miso/ice cream diet and 9-hour lady film festival, I really don’t think I’d last very long.  However, it was superfun to indulge, and I was glad to channel my inner rap star and try a new outlet for my creativity.

And now, for whatever reason, I can’t seem to go to bed just yet.  But…a girl has to try.

Good night!